Today's guest post comes from my dear friend Janine, who always gives the best advice.
I am the mom whose kids get straight As, Os (Outstanding) and Is (works independently with no prompting).
My children receive yellow tickets that they can redeem for prizes on a daily basis.
Mine are the kids that receive praise from teachers, other parents, and even strangers.
They are well behaved, have lots of friends, are smart and apply themselves.
They also have an enormous fear of getting a ‘try harder’ stamp.
A ‘try harder’ is given out if you forget your homework, or if you are a little too talkative, disrespectful, that sort of thing. After three ‘try harder’s’ you get a self-check form. After that, your parents get a call.
My children turn white as a sheet at the mere mention of a ‘try harder’.
One of their teachers gave the class a warning this winter: if the entire class doesn’t behave, than everyone will get a try harder.
My one daughter came home in tears because she was terrified the class would cause her to get a ‘try harder’.
Tears.
Tears at the mere mention.
It’s a ‘try harder’ not a note or call to your parents. Try Harder.
To me it means you made a mistake, try harder next time.
Isn’t that how we learn?
Let me also clarify that we are not strict parents.
I swear, we aren’t. Ask Jodi (I think she could vouch for us).
We have no idea where this fear came from.
So we have had to sit our perfect little girls down and explain to them that someday they WILL get a try harder.
Someday they’ll forget their homework.
Someday they’ll get a little too rowdy.
Someday they’ll get a C.
And when that day comes we’ll be here for them just as we are for the As and Os and Is. We will still love them, we will still be proud of them, and their world will not come crashing down upon them.
After this talk they sigh, give us a perfect little hug, and immediately start arguing.
They are only perfect when they want to be.
We may start giving out try harder’s at home.
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
This is soooo my daughter. Last year her Kindergarten teacher who is the sweetest person to walk the planet and never, ever raises her voice told the entire class to “Quiet down.” Because she was standing by my daughter’s desk when she said this my daughter came home in tears that she was yelled at by her teacher. It sounded so out of character for the teacher that I asked her to see what the deal was. I couldn’t believe a class warning upset her that much. And like, you I am not sure where this comes from because we aren’t all that strict either. Glad we are not the only ones in this boat.
Sarah that has happened to us too!
We’ve had the “she yelled at me” and later found out she yelled at the CLASS.
Thanks for the comment!