Everything I Need To Know I Learned From Kindergarten Soccer

When Michael was two or three, I honestly can't even remember, he took an indoor soccer class.  And he hated it.  In the beginning he would go and just act out and not pay attention but towards the end he would cry and throw temper tantrums when it came time to go.  And we were taking the class with my play group and all their kids seemed to love it so I made him go.  Which looking back was a big mistake (if you know now what you knew then) but I think at some point we just stopped going. And at some point I wrote sports off for Michael. He was never really interested or he hated it and it was not worth the argument.

He liked his theater classes.  And then he started getting into karate.  And swimming started catching on. Maybe it is team sports I started to think.  It was really not that big of a deal to me.  Not all kids are sports kids.  And really, this way I'm not spending my weekends at games and running from here and there and dealing with parents yelling at kids when they don't score.  I wasn't honestly that upset about it.

A mom in Michael's kindergarten class approached me about soccer early in the Spring.  Soccer is a big deal where we live.  Pretty much everyone plays it for the same organization that I played for a million and half years ago.  A lot of the boys in Michael's class were signing up and were we going to sign up? Did I know to request this team?  I hadn't even realized it started in kindergarten.  And then she explained the kindergarten program was five "games" which consisted of no practices and just drills and a scrimmage.  They had done it in the fall.  "It's really fun and low key.  Not competitive.  The boys love it.  You should try it."  

I shrugged it off and thought to myself "Michael will HATE IT.  And I don't want to do that again."  And then I realized I was being ridiculous.  Our soccer experience was 3 years ago, and there was so much emotion tied up in that for me, about him being the kid who was different, the kid who stood out from the rest, that I couldn't see the forest for the trees.  Michael could like soccer now.  Why not try it?

So I asked him.

"Michael, A's mom asked me if you want to play soccer with him and a bunch of boys in your class?  Do you think you want to do that?"

"I'm not good at soccer."

"Michael, no one your age is good at soccer.  It's not about being good at soccer.  It's about having fun.  And trying."

"I don't know."

"Tell you what.  There are five games.  You try it this time.  If you don't like, we don't ever have to do it again."

"Who is playing?"

And then I started rattling off the names of boys in his class.

"Okay."

"Okay?"

"Okay.  I want to play soccer."

And we bought a ball, and soccer socks, and shin guards.  I drew the line at cleats. I'm lucky I can get regular shoes to fit Michael.  For 5 games, he could wear his tennis shoes.  The first 2 games were rained out, and then he was sick, and now, he has played three games.

And you know what?  He likes soccer.

Yes, kindergarten soccer is organized chaos and pretty much every week someone cries.  And sometimes he is not paying attention.  And sometimes he gets kicked in the shin.  But he runs around in gorgeous weather with other boys in his class and afterwards they go to the ice cream truck.

Last week he asked me to sign him up again in the Fall.

Michael taught me that sometimes, it is okay to do things even if you are scared, even if you don't think you are going to be good at it, and that it is okay to try again.

Michael taught me you have to let things go.  

He is probably not going to be a soccer star or going to play select or play on a traveling team. But he no longer hates soccer or all team sports and he no longer believes he is terrible at it.

And more and more, I think we are all going to be okay.