Michael is all of a sudden talking about his weight. "Am I fat, mommy?" "Do I look fat, mommy?" "When I grow up am I going to be fat?" "I want to be thin when I grow up." "Fat is bad."
He's five. I will also point out, not that it matters, that he is very, very thin. So thin that for the first two years of his life the pediatrician lectured me about his weight. To the point that I finally looked at them and said, "he is meeting all of milestones, and with the obesity epidemic in children I can't even believe we are discussing this. I will not discuss this child's weight again until there is an issue. 20th percentile for weight is fine." He is now 40th percentile for weight and 90th for height. Just like his dad.
I have struggled with weight all my life. Only in the past 6 months can I honestly say I have come to terms with the way I look. I am who I am and while I could probably lose another 10 pounds, it is not going to change much.
I never ever imagined raising a boy would bring up these issues. In fact, Doug once told me he was grateful we don't have a girl because he would hate for me to transfer my body issues to her. We don't talk about weight in our house. We talk about eating healthy and making good choices and sometimes foods and having treats, but I don't think I have ever described anybody as fat or thin. Especially a five year old. Where is this coming from? Kindergarten?
I tried to redirect the conversation to how weight was not important but health was, but it didn't get me anywhere. I'm not sure how to change the conversation. To make him see that there is nothing wrong with him. To show him that words like fat and thin do not belong anywhere in his vocabulary.





{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }
Kids pick it up in our society. And yeah, that young. Sad, right?!?
Both of my kids said the exact same thing to me last year when they were six. I was blown away because we have never discussed weight in our house. Ever.
My kids are on the skinny side, too. Jake would push his stomach out as far as he could and say, “Look, I’m fat.” Not concerned, just matter of fact. We talked it out for a few days and I haven’t heard another word about it from either of them. Their appetites didn’t change in the slightest. I really think it’s just one of those things kids discuss at some point when someone at school starts saying “fat” and it doesn’t mean they develop body issues.
Yep it’s a school/society/awareness thing. It should go away soon.
We had Brynna tested for something or other when she was three and the only question she missed in the critical thinking section was, “Which cat is the fattest?” I said that we don’t use that word in our house, so she probably didn’t know it and they looked at me like I was crazy. She knew the words culinary, imagination, design, sculpture and equine, but they were concerned about her vocabulary because she didn’t know fat.
Of course, she does now. *Sigh*
This is a very long time issue of kids, adults, teens and even the old age. I would suggest you to get him nice clothes, good books, nice friends and speak more about spirituality. I am sure he will forget about fat, thin concept and start enjoying the life
School. Other kids. Most likely talking negativity about another kid in front of him. It sucks how early it starts. My girls are super thin too and they’ve both had times of asking about weight.
I SO get this!
And cannot believe that your ped was lecturing you for a 205h %ile baby – both of my boys have turned out to be scrawny babies in the less than 5th %ile for weight and 50th% for height, but are very healthy and our ped gives me no grief.
My oldest son (7) does this fat thing all the time, never mind you can count his ribs, and we just talk, talk, talk it out.