Scene: My kitchen, with blood, and glass, everywhere:
"Michael, can you get me a band-aid. I broke glass and I'm bleeding."
"What kind of band-aid do you want?"
"I don't care there is just a lot of blood and I need you help. Daddy's not home."
5 minutes go by. "Michael, seriously, band-aid."
"Mommy, a band-aid is an important decision. I want to get you the right one."
Another two minutes.
"Ok, I brought you a Tinkerbell band-aid because I know you love Tinkerbell. (I do not love Tinkerbell. I did not even know we had Tinkerbell band-aids in the house.)
The child brought me the tiniest band-aid known to man. I sliced my hand open by putting it through a glass bottle. I was contemplating the ER by the time he brought me a band-aid. I might have gone if Doug was home.
"Um, thanks Michael."
"Mom, can I have a bead since I was so helpful?" (New behavior management plan brought to you by teachmama. It's working great for behavior at home. It's not translating so well for behavior at school.)
"Yes Michael you can have a bead since you were so helpful."
"A big bead?"
"No Michael, big beads are saved for extra special things. A small bead."
"A medium bead?"
"Fine."
"Mom, you changed your band-aid."
"Um, I bled through that one. There is a lot of blood."
"Mom, I'm so sorry. Those band-aids were waterproof. I really thought you needed a waterproof band-aid."
Clearly, I need to teach him how to dial 911.
{ 10 comments… read them below or add one }
I’m sorry for laughing at your pain and injury but this did really make me laugh. “A band aid is an important decision.” I hope you’re healing up.
OMG that is so funny, sorry to laugh at your pain! Hope you are OK and did not need the ER.
He is too analytical for his own good, and yours
My morning laugh brought to me by Jodifur and Michael. Thank you so much! Band-Aids are very important decisions.
I hope you heal up soon!
Oh my! That is too funny!
Oh No. Sorry about your hand. For the record, I totally rocked a Dora the Explorer band-aid the other week. I actually liked it better than the generic brown ones…
He’s too cute. Bandaids are absolutely an important decision. Hey he wanted to make you happy with the pretty bandaid. I hope your cut heals fast and you don’t need to go to the ER. Bless his heart. I do think it deserved a medium bead, because he helped you with something important.
Oh my gosh, that conversation cracks me up only because it would be something similar with my daughter. Sorry about your hand though.
He is so freaking cute. Not so helpful, but cute. Waterproof. ha.
Sometimes on the character band-aids, they will add in a few of whatever the new band-aid is. Hence, you probably had two Tinkerbell band-aids in a package of Spider man or Sponge Bob or whatever Michael’s character of choice is.
Oh, Jodi–you are a riot. Seriously, laughed out loud at this. :*( sorry.
Good luck w/ the ‘gem jars’ or whatever you’re calling it. Certainly not foolproof, but it’s something. Who knew this parenting gig would be as hard as it is? Not I. . .
Cheers, friend. Hope to catch up with you soon,
ame