Let's just say, hypothetically, your child had a medical issue. It is not life threatening or mind altering and no one is going to die from it, but it is upsetting and a problem. You see a specialist for said medical issue, as your pediatrician is out of ideas. You explain how long said medical issue has been going on and everything you have tried to correct it. And, after talking for 15 minutes, the doctor tells you to do the exact same thing you have already tried and did not work. In fact, one might say this course of action failed miserably and caused more problems. You try to explain this to the doctor and she nods her head and says, "no, no it was working, you just didn't give it enough time to work." It becomes clear that this is the advice she gives all of her patients and she is not really listening to you, or your child.
Do you:
A. Run from her office screaming?
B. Nod your head, take the instructions, and leave knowing you will never go back there?
C. Think about what she said, talk it over with your husband, and decide like morons to treat your child like a guinea pig?
D. Come home to a clogged kitchen sink and cry?
E. All of the above.
{ 24 comments… read them below or add one }
I hope you ran screaming (hypothetically, of course) and called her a stupid sod on the way out!
You listen to your gut.
Even when it tells you to cry.
If you KNOW that’s missing the mark with your kid, you listen to your gut.
F. Get a second opinion. Doctors make mistakes too!
I second the second.Kennedy Krieger is just up the road.
Nothing is wrong with getting a second opinion, and if that opinion doesn’t make sense, doesn’t work, or is vastly different than the first, get a third.
I had one pediatrician who didn’t listen to me, and thinking about the way that jerk never even made eye contact with me when I was on the verge of tears explaining that something was VERY WRONG with my daughter… well, I want to drive across town right now just to punch him.
So, I would’ve picked:
F. Point out the doctor’s poor listening skills and suggest that perhaps he/she might be better suited for a career in telemarketing if all he/she wants to do is recite the same rehearsed script all day long.
Or you know, failing that, I’d go find another specialist.
F. Pour a big ol’ glass of wine and then get a second opinion.
I was listening to a study on NPR that said doctors (on average) listen to patients for 5 seconds or less before diagnosing. SO ANNOYING! As tough as it is I would go find someone else. I’d also fax over a letter asking for all of my child’s records and state WHY I was finding another doctor.
i second miss britt… YOU know your child better than ANYONE else. back when my son was sick as a baby, his occupational therapist told me that 85% of mother’s intuition is proven to be medically correct.
yes, i would cry at the kitchen sink. get it out. release the tension and the emotional stress.
and then kick some ass. because you know your child.
None of those options involved slapping the doctor.
Strange….
I can speak from personal experience on this one. I was the squeaky wheel. And I just kept getting squeakier until someone listened. And that might have included a semi-temper-tantrum in my daughter’s pediatrician’s office *ahem*
You are the ONLY one who can and will advocate for your child. If you know something is wrong then don’t let it go.
Also, sometimes doing your research online and presenting a doctor with what you think will work and/or possible coarses of action (read: do their job for them and just get them to sign off on it) works wonders
Hope you’re able to get this resolved. xoxo
*all of the above*
i’m sorry.
I am sorry to hear that the doctor was NOT LISTENING….
Get a second opinion and a third or fourth if you have to.
Michael is a blessing and you are a strong advocate in his corner.
Get a second opinion! My advice? See a Nurse Practitioner. But then again, I’m biased
I think that you should have told her to her face in a very loud and probably un-Jodi like voice that you are going to explain the problem again, and this time very s-l-o-w-l-y because she clearly WASN’T LISTENING! How frustrating!
trust your gut. sounds to me like you may need to interview for a new pediatrician
You trust your gut.
And if she won’t listen to you, even though it’s something small? You keep looking until you find a doctor who will. You don’t want this kind of doctor when something is life threatening.
I would change E to cry in a bottle of whiskey and then F to decide to get a second opionion and then G to all of the above. And then I would wonder if I could get all the way through the alphabet with my liver in tact.
I, personally, have some health problems that were going un- or mis-diagnosed and were ruining my life. I did hours and hours of online studying and knew exactly what to say to the Drs to get them to listen. I now see a combination of holistic and regular doctors and have seen an improvement.
good luck.
whiskey.
I don’t think it’s acceptable that a doctor won’t listen to you when you are talking to them about your child. You are your kid’s best advocate and doctors should listen to you, especially when you tell them you already tried what they suggest and it didn’t work! I’ve been known to scream at the people who are dealing with Ashley for her various appointments, when I’ve been upset about something.
It kills me when doctor’s don’t listen. This is one of the reasons we’re looking for a new pediatrician right now. Follow your gut.
Hypothetically, I would have punched the doctor in the trachea and asked if the doctor needed a hearning aid because, obviously, they were unable to hear a word I was saying.
Realistically, I would have left there and called another doctor for another opinion.
I’d be afraid of a scene in front of my kid, so I’d go with B, then get a copy of the records and find a new doctor! There are a lot of doctors out there, and you don’t need to put up with that kind of crap. In my experience, getting worked up and getting in their face doesn’t really work: doctors always seem to think they know better than the “untrained, overemotional” patients, and don’t care what you have to say.
Take a breath, have a drink, see a movie, and FIND ANOTHER DOCTOR! good luck!
Maybe there’s a reason why it was so easy to get an appointment with this doctor. Unfortunately, I’ve found this to be true in other specialties.
Dude. That way sucks. I’m so sorry. I missed several weeks of blogs and was just going through my reader and saw this. That absolutely sucks. I’m really sorry she didn’t listen to you. Mental note: don’t recommend her to anyone else. Oy.
I hope said problem has since resolved itself. I’m assuming it has?