Michael's teacher didn't know he wasn't coming back next year. I gave her her goodbye gift yesterday, and she said "goodbye, why not end of the year?" And I guess I thought the director would have told her. But she didn't, so I did. And she looked like someone squashed her puppy.
"I really wish you would have talked to me. I mean, I understand why you made this decision but I think he would do better if he stayed here. He has just done so well."
"I just want him in the system. I think he will need an IEP and that process takes forever and we need to get it rolling."
"WHATEVER ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?"
I'm not exaggerating. The women looked like I had about 17 heads. Like why would I ever think this child could need an IEP?
"I want you to keep in touch. I want to know how he is doing. I wanted him to stay because he is such a success story. I wanted to watch him continue to grow and succeed. Please make sure I know how he is doing. He's going to be fine. I know he's going to be fine."
How can she know it? And two of my closest friends told me the same thing on Sunday. How come I can't know it? A year ago I never would have thought about IEPs or learning disabilities. And now I can't get them out of my head.
{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }
She seems like someone who really cares, and I’m sure if she says he’s going to be okay, then she has a good reason to think so.
I’ve been reading through your posts about coming to this decision. My boy is entering 2nd grade next year, and so much of what you’ve written is heartbreakingly familiar to me. Hang in there – I agree with the course you’ve chosen, as it is the one we chose for our son. It’s not always easy dealing with labels and administrations, but we’ve seen a direct correlation between the services he’s received and his ability to self-regulate and succeed in school.
Sounds like he really made an impression on her. I think it *is* normal for us to go through periods of doubts and uncertainty. We see the whole picture and the aftermath of the good and bad days at school. My girl is having a stellar time at a day camp this week after hating school all year. Night and day what the right environment can nurture in a kid. I know Michael will take the love and learning of this year and believe in himself. I will always think you made the right decision.
I guess it’s sore of proof on how that woman at the last pre-school really got in your head. The things she said, are hard to let go of.
I think you and Michael really needed this school this past year. I think it has helped him to see he can be different in school and he’s grown tons and learned so much. It also helped you to see that while he may need a bit of help later, he’s not unteachable or whatever else that A-Hole woman said to you. But it unfortunately doesn’t undo the fear or doubt that woman placed in your head. In time, you’ll see that he is okay. Or he will need some assistance. Either way, he will still be okay. But until he is in kindergarten and you know for sure, it may continue to be on your mind.
When I look through your posts and photos of Michael, I see a happy, healthy growing boy, who does so much more than my own 5 year old! And my son is starting Kindergarten at the public school I teach at next year. And I have no worries about him, and know that he is on track and smart. So I agree with the previous commenters that at some point you will get past what that previous teacher (wrongly, and with no right to) told you. Remember it takes FAR longer to break a bad habit than it takes to learn it. So with relatively few words, she has put doubt in your head that will, unfortunately, take a long time to get out. I can’t wait MIchael hits Kindergarten and surprises you yet again!
When I look through your posts and photos of Michael, I see a happy, healthy growing boy, who does so much more than my own 5 year old! And my son is starting Kindergarten at the public school I teach at next year. And I have no worries about him, and know that he is on track and smart. So I agree with the previous commenters that at some point you will get past what that previous teacher (wrongly, and with no right to) told you. Remember it takes FAR longer to break a bad habit than it takes to learn it. So with relatively few words, she has put doubt in your head that will, unfortunately, take a long time to get out. I can’t wait MIchael hits Kindergarten and surprises you yet again!
I think sometimes it’s easier to believe the negative assessments of others than it is to believe their positive ones. So, when someone said that Michael had some problems that needed to be worked out, that stuck, rather than all of the people telling you that either those problems don’t exist, or that they’ve worked themselves out for the most part. It’s in our parental nature to worry first, accept the good second. Unfortunately.
I have no worries about him, and know that he is on track and smart. So I agree with the previous commenters that at some point you will get past what that previous teacher (wrongly, and with no right to) told you. Remember it takes FAR longer to break a bad habit than it takes to learn it. So with relatively few words, she has put doubt in your head that will, unfortunately, take a long time to get out, thanx.