Everything Is Changing At Once
I have found, for me, one of the hardest parts of being a parent is making all of these decisions for another person. How do I know what is best for Michael? I barely know what is best for me.
After Michael's accident I made this rash phone call to our first choice preschool last year, the one we got wait listed to, and asked to be placed on the wait list for next year. I knew he was going to camp there this summer and kind of figured hey, what the hell? I was not in such a good place and had to do something, anything.
And then, things turned around. We finished the year out. And I never really thought about it again.
Last week, they called. There was a spot, did we want it?
Do we want it?
And I immediately go into mass panic phone call mode. And I beg Doug to just make the decision for us. Because I can't make this call. I don't know what's right. I made this decision last time, and Michael got hurt.
Michael likes his school, he has friends there, he doesn't even remember the accident.
But the other school was my first choice. Always was my first choice. And it is where he will go to camp. So there will be no transition to camp, back to school and then back to this place for camp next year, he will just be there. They have a pre-K program, my school does not. They are more friendly to working parents. The hours are better, the calendar is better.
But Michael likes his school. And with (hopefully, please) a move to a new house, is it really the time to change schools? And why do I have to make this decision in 5 minutes?
How can I decide what is best for a whole other person? What if I'm wrong? My goodness it's preschool, it cannot matter this much.
In the end, we decided to move him. And I think I knew that before I even went through the steps of making the decision. And hopefully it will work out.
As my best friend likes to say, you will never know if you made the right decision because you will never know what will happen if you made the other one.
It was your 1st choice for a reason. Is it a better school? If so, do it. It may actually be less change since Michael won't have to change again in September. You can always plan platdates with his classmates so he won't miss his friends.
Posted by: Maura | 06/01/2009 at 08:16 AM
I am sure you made the right choice! Having worked at a (horrible) preschool, when it comes time for my son to go I am not sure what I want to do. It freaks me out.
Posted by: Didi | 06/01/2009 at 08:16 AM
I hope this helps ease your mind, as I was reading this, I was thinking- "she should move him". It sounds like in the long run, there will be less transitions this way, because he is going to camp there and there is Pre-K there. Plus, as Maura said, "it was your 1st choice for a reason".
Posted by: Janna | 06/01/2009 at 09:34 AM
I'm sure this school was your first choice for a reason. I'm sure he'll love it. But I totally understand. Jocelyn's going to a new preschool next year too because of our move. I loved this school as soon as I saw it. But I keep wondering if I should have just sucked it up and dealt with the longer drive. Oh well. I think this is tougher than deciding where to go to college!
Posted by: Lauren | 06/01/2009 at 09:37 AM
Sounds like you were very thoughtful and made the right decision. I'm with Janna in that I was thinking "definitely move him" as I was reading. Good luck!
Posted by: aimee | 06/01/2009 at 10:06 AM
It sounds like you went with your gut instinct, which means you probably made the right decision.
Posted by: cagey | 06/01/2009 at 11:43 AM
Your gut said new school from the beginning . . . looks like it was a good opportunity! And . . . either choice would have been Just Fine.
Posted by: Elaine at Lipstickdaily | 06/01/2009 at 01:06 PM
I think you made the right decision, because you liked it so much in the first place. Michael is a very resilient kid too ... I'm sure he'll love camp and the new school too. Also, being more friendly is good for you. You'll be happier and calmer and a better mom.
Posted by: Stacy | 06/01/2009 at 02:31 PM
So tough...luckily at this age they are quite resilient. You made the best choice that you could. Now take a deep breath and relax...or try to. He'll be fine :)
Posted by: Kimberly | 06/01/2009 at 03:02 PM
I think you did the right thing - the kid will likely adapt really easily.
Posted by: magpie | 06/01/2009 at 03:10 PM
I agonized over moving my daughter last year. But we decided in the long run it would be better. Within a month, she changed daycares (having been at the first for 2.5 yrs) we moved to a new house, and I changed jobs (to one that is more demanding and requires some travel). Kids are more adaptable than we think sometimes - and if they're not, they should be. They have to change classes every year starting in kindergarten, kids will come and go into their lives, school districts will change, etc. She'll go to kindergarten in Sept. and probably won't know one other child, but she'll be fine. I don't mean it's not a big decision, but it sounds like you made it the right way.
Posted by: DemMom | 06/01/2009 at 03:33 PM
Just assume that you have made the right choice. Don't second guess yourself. He will adapt and do great. It was your first choice for a reason. Congrats on the new school!
Posted by: Stimey | 06/01/2009 at 11:12 PM
I totally don't think you were asking my opinion here, but I'm giving it anyway. Kids like whatever they're used to. Most LITTLE kids adjust to new friends very easily. There are SO many pros to the new school, I think you made the right choice.
Posted by: Della | 06/03/2009 at 12:48 PM