Today's guest post is brought to you by Jessica from A Parent in Silver Spring. She is as delightful in person and she seems in this post. We both live in Montgomery County, Md.
being lulled to sleep by the sound of trucks on 495 or 270 and telling yourself they sound like waves crashing on the beach.
you pay more for the babysitter than the tickets to see your favorite band's show in DC.
making three separate grocery trips when hosting a dinner party in order to buy wine, liquor, and food.
getting to use your native or school-learned Spanish on a daily basis.
your hometown relatives should never be told what you paid for your mid-century 3 bedroom house or 1990's townhome.
mommy politics at preschool drop-off and pickup is like a flashback to the high school lunchroom.
you weep when entering the palatial homes of friends in Missouri and Colorado.
the word "immersion" brings elusive French- and Spanish-language public school classrooms to mind, not swimming lessons.
you've been to children's birthday parties fancier than your own wedding.
your children use chopsticks at age 1; at age 2 can differentiate between the meatballs at Pho 75 and Pho 88.
the kids have enjoyed the benefits of free admission to the Smithsonian more than an entire charter bus of traveling 8th graders.
preschool admissions "counselors" show you the lists of colleges whom miniature alumni have gone on to attend, and when you laugh they make pencil marks on your kid's chart.
your liberal-hippie-vegan-free
you chat up moms at the playground like you used to pick up guys in bars.
your 4 year old tells you he wished you worked so he could have a cute tube-top-wearing Austrian au pair like his friend Steve. Child is immediately sent to Time Out.
you wake from a vivid dream of your old pre-SAHM job and can't figure out if it was a nightmare or a fantasy.
you've adjusted your hours to a part-time or flexible hours arrangement and can't decide whether this is a godsend or a pact with the devil.
you work in a town where women's rights are fought for on the Senate floor, yet you still have to pump your breastmilk in a supply closet.
you know exactly what times to avoid rush hour at your local park in order for your baby to get a chance at the bucket swings.
when parents talk about "summer camps" they don't mean sleep-away mountain destinations, but $500 per week daycamps that end at lunchtime and still leave you hanging for day care for 5 hours.
you have to decide between 1 week at the Outer Banks or pool membership for the entire summer when figuring out the summer extras budget.
the stay-at-home dads are the 30-and-40-something equivalent of the cutest boys in your predominantly-female English major seminar. Just like in college, you're too chicken to talk to them and they're all taken.
when planning playdate snacks, you don't just ask the other mom about peanut allergies, but clear any servings of dairy, processed sugar, gluten, soy or non-organic foods…and imbibe shots of tequila before they arrive.
family bonding means watching Sprout's Goodnight Show cuddled together on the couch, your refuge of love from the lightening fast-pace of the MoCo.
{ 12 comments… read them below or add one }
All so true! Great guest post!
All so true! Great guest post!
All so true! Great guest post!
All so true! Great guest post!
Thanks for the linky love!
Thanks for the linky love!
Thanks for the linky love!
Thanks for the linky love!
Fun list! Not too different from where I live in southern Fla.
Fun list! Not too different from where I live in southern Fla.
Fun list! Not too different from where I live in southern Fla.
Fun list! Not too different from where I live in southern Fla.